A feeling of guilt, a feeling of not fulfilling my duties as a son that I could have done better , could have cared better in their later stage of life makes my heart bleeds !
As time goes by, I feel so far away and disconnected from the past that I suddenly have an intense yearning to go back. Losing my father in 2013 and my mum in 2020 made a huge impact in my life. I like many things about my life in the present. But if I could turn around and walk into the past, knowing I’d find my way back here again to the people I love, I’d do it in a heartbeat. No one tells you when you’re young that life can change so much. That one day, you may realize the people and places of your past feel like they’re from a completely different story. It seems we simply cannot leave some people behind, especially people who are dead and whom we may wish to forget, because remembering hurts. It may hurt because we miss them and our ongoing love for them is painful. It may hurt because we feel guilty for not appreciating them more.
There are always going to be moments when we’ll look in the mirror and recognise their smile in the way we smile, or remember the way they waved their hands in the air in frustration, their way of talking, their emotions because we do that too. Perhaps we have a temper, like them; perhaps we are good with children, just as they were. Our confidence or insecurity, our particular fears and the way we love, are influenced by them.
I miss you…I need you.
The Bose Family Leaflets 
Dada 🙏🙏🙏 fully understand your pain … lost my father back in 1987 and that void still exists. You were and are still their good son .. they were and will be proud of you no matter where they are .. so please stop feeling guilty.. unfortunately we can’t turn the wheels of time. We are here … we are here to help you in getting back and help your family that looks up to you for your guidance and help. 🙏🙏🙏 Vijay Joshi 19 Mar 21
Thank you so much. I thoroughly understand but sometimes can’t accept it… Thanks for all the support.